true facts - a few little things about me
I was posting away on Instagram the other day when I received a message from one of my crafty friends. She nominated me to list 5 facts about myself on my insta stories and to nominate a few other people to do the same thing. After about ten minutes of faffing, I managed to work out how to do that (I’m not the best with using the stories part of the ‘gram) and posted the facts to my feed.
Later that day, it occurred to me that I’ve been blogging here for about 8 months and although I’m sure you all know a fair bit about me from reading my posts, I figure there’s no harm in creating a post with some true facts about me for your delectation ;-)
I lie to hairdressers all the time
I’m currently still in ‘hair detox’ after bleaching my hair pastel pink over two years ago. It did soooo much damage to my poor head, but it looked soooo pretty. I’ll probably end up doing it again at some point, regardless of the doom it caused, as I absolutely loved it and I’VE LEARNED NOTHING. That’s not the thing I lie about though… my fringe, I lie about my fringe. Every time I visit a salon I’ll get asked the question ‘who cuts your fringe?’ and I’ll say ‘a friend’ when we both know that its me. I cut my fringe in that wonky-ass way… we know its a lie, but we both play along. They’ll say to me ‘you know you can pop in here any time you like for a free fringe trim’, the subtext of that statement being ‘stop cutting your own damn fridge you nightmare human’ and I’ll nod along and say ‘oh really, that’s great, I’ll deffo do that’ - but we both know that won’t happen and in the next fortnight I’ll be turning the scissors on myself and then going ‘oops, maybe if I just chop a bit off… oops… maybe if I… oh I’ve ruined it’. Still, hair grows… am I right?!
I love pizza
I know people say that a lot, but they don’t know what they’re talking about. I dream of pizza and its bubbly cheesy delights. I could very happily eat pizza every. single. day and not get bored of it. When my husband was out in the evenings three nights a week doing his degree I would be responsible for my own tea and that would mean eating pizza for those three nights - there was no shame… only fatty, fatty, joy, joy. Pizza is the best. It’s quick to make, it cooks in 10 minutes and it’s just filled and topped with all the best things a person could ask for. One day I will go to Italy, order a proper margarita, climb onto the table, roll myself up in it like a burrito and die happy - think about that the next time you say you love pizza… would you roll yourself up in it and die, Susan? Then no, you don’t love pizza, you merely consume it… you amateur.
True crime is my jam
I’ve always been a creepy little weirdo when it comes to true crime. I used to rent books from the town library when I was a kid about Jack the Ripper. I would devour the coroners reports written in ye olde English and stare at the black and white photographs of the crime scenes, looking for clues and trying to work out what really happened. As an adult, if I heard someone say ‘arterial spray’ at a house party full of people, I would climb over other human beings and make a bee-line for that person, jab them in the ribs and say ‘what you got’ like some crack-crazed junkie looking for a fix. One of the best things that I’ve found in the last few years is that true crime has become waaay more accessible than it was when I was younger. There are quite literally 100s of podcasts purely devoted to crime, there are tonnes of documentaries on Netflix to consume and there are movies and TV shows galore about serial killers and the people that catch them. This is all great news for me… I am Murder Johnny 5, and I always need more input!
I love my craft room
I understand that if you’re a non-crafty person and you hear that someone has a craft room you immediately judge them. A craft room conjures up imagery of a woman, whose children have all flown the nest, turning one of their empty bedrooms into a room piled high with shabby chic furniture, gingham and scatter cushions. You can see it, can’t you? I don’t judge that lady though, she’s doing her thing. When we moved into our house I immediately claimed the tiny box room as my ‘lady room’. I painted it pink and filled it with a dressing table and turned it into my make up zone. It served me very well until last year when I decided to re-brand it as my craft room and filled it with a desk and my ever-growing collection of paper craft STUFF. I love this room and it’s bursting with all the things that are ‘me’, everyone should be so lucky to have a little space to be themselves - let your freak flag fly and don’t judge people, it gives you wrinkles.
I don’t believe in guilty pleasures
When people tell me that they have a guilty pleasure I want to sit them down, hold their hands and explain that there is nothing wrong with liking something that’s considered unpopular - if you like it, you like it, you shouldn’t feel guilty about it… unless your guilty pleasure is not washing your hands after peeing, or buying The Sun… then maybe you should feel a little guilty and wash your hands. I offer up Phil Collins as my personal ‘guilty pleasure’ example… the man himself appears to be somewhat problematic and a bit of a tool bag, but I am in love with a few of his albums and songs. I don’t want to meet him, I just want to listen to him sing. I don’t feel guilt about liking his music, despite my husbands and mothers protests (it makes me laugh so hard that they both share a hatred for the man and his music). His voice brings back car trip memories (my dads turn on the cassette player) and makes me nostalgic and fuzzy inside - how can that be a bad thing? No guilt here, just an eclectic mix of Led Zeppelin, Queen, Peter Gabriel, George Benson, Luther Vandross, Run the Jewels and Marilyn Manson.
So there we go, 5 is probably enough for now and then based on the response I get I can always post more later in the year :-)
If you fancy saying hello back, feel free to pop a comment at the bottom of the page.
Until next time beans x